Just yesterday I was talking to my neighbor about being an adult and still wanting parental approval.
It’s funny because Nici and Bug already search for it. She pauses and waits for my eye contact before becoming a bounce machine. He’ll lash out and then cling to my leg in true bear cub fashion seeking attention and love.
We don’t outgrow this, the lashing out and clinging, the desire for direct eye contact; the desire to be seen and cherished and praised.
And as I lay in bed next to my bear cub I can’t help but think on how my parents balanced this…the internal dialogue went like this:
Parents: if you play with dragons, you’re going to get burnt
Me: I want to play with dragons so I will (I don’t know where Nici gets his defiance)
Parents: here’s some burn cream. What did you learn? By the way, you are fearless and awesome.
(Yes, How to Train Your Dragon is Nici’s current obsession)
And as I lay there hugging my bearcub I know he will ride dragons bareback.
And I listen to my little bug with her heavy sleepy breaths thinking, “let her sleep for when she wakes she will breathe fire.”
And I pray I equip them appropriately. That they always feel loved and seen and treasured and fearless.
And I pray that when I do drop the ball it’s ok, because they know their heavenly Father who always sees and always loves.
And I remind myself I am His child too. And enjoy playing with Dragons.