Neon Jesus

I’ve thought deeply on the idea of Sabbath a few times in my life.

I love the idea of a special day set aside to celebrate and give thanks to our Lord.

It’s probably why I love Valentines Day so much, an entire day to say thanks and I love you to those most important in our lives!

But I’ve never found a way of keeping the feeling of Sabbath, of sanctuary and thanks and resting in my Lord’s hands longer than noon.

During church, when I sing and sway with my babes curling into me, I give glory and glow in His presence, overwhelmed with His obvious presence in my life, in my lap.

During services, I take notes and am contemplative, soaking up knowledge and forming more questions.

Then we head home…and my blood pressure begins to rise one idiot driver at a time.

And I’m hungry (hangry), and the dishes are dirty, and the meal isn’t ready (or is overly done), and the dog puked, and my babe is defiant, and I step on a Lego…

Serenity is gone.

Does my worship, my thanks, mean anything if I can’t hold onto it for longer than a few hours? If I’m so easily swayed into ugly?

I need to pray more on this, come up with some actual ways of accessing the deep peace and joy and gratefulness I do have for/with my Lord.

This morning I went to Target (shocking I know) and I picked up one of those really kitschy religious candles with different saints and brightly copied religious images on them.

(I love them in a bold, bad kitschy sort of way)

neon jesusAnd this week, in the afternoon, when it’s that cranky hour, when the peace starts slipping and I need a snickers (I’m not myself when hungry), I’m going to light that candle.

And with the golden flicker of flame against my neon Jesus, I’ll say a pray.

I’m actively pursuing peace. I’m choosing gratitude and finding real life ways to remind myself of it.

And ok, that’s not a Sabbath solution, but just maybe some days it will help.

And it’ll be worth it for the someday

-J

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