Flesh vs. Soul Satisfaction

“ Peace comes, at least in part, from learning how to control…the power of the tongue”

 “ The tongue is a small thing that makes grand speeches. But a tiny spark can set a forest on fire” James 3:5

This week has been testing. I’ve been feeling a lot of feelings (thanks hormones) and dealing with a very trying situation.

I have a lot of words I want to say. Words that will sting and bite and thoroughly prove my point.

Words that will wound and hurt despite the pleasure I’ll momentarily experience when letting them free.

It has taken me a very long time to learn to control my tongue. I still have a very long way to go.

The last word is flesh satisfying, but soul hindering.

I want soul peace, not flesh.

In the words of Belle (via Beauty and the Beast): You must control your temper!

fleshy tongue pleasure

Some words need to be said- even if they are painful to hear.

However, I’m slowly learning to wait on my delivery until the anger has passed. Until I can extend some compassion and grace with the heavy words.

Sometimes that’s hours, sometimes that’s weeks.

Until it is that right time, I pray. I use all my words.

The bitter, angry, biting words.

The joyful, grateful, happy words.

All the in between words.

I give them to my God who graciously listens,

Who has heard and felt the full spectrum of my words many times over.

He holds me and my words close. He calms me down, he loves me (ugly words and all)

He is helping me learn to leave some of the ugly with him, He can handle it. He wants to handle it.

I’m a work in progress. My mouth still explodes far more than I would like it to.

This week has been trying. I have a lot of feelings and a lot of words.

So I pray: God grant me grace. Grace to extend outwards towards others; to keep the ugly between us and give the hard words in love. Grace to extend towards myself when I fail. And wisdom to know what is hard and must be said and what is just fleshy pleasure in delivery.

-J

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