Prepare me for the Wind

It’s hard to believe who I was 2 ½ years ago.

I was a good girl, past the rebellious stage, but still looking.

prepare me windThen we got pregnant- and I found myself again- the one who had wandered for far too long.

It wasn’t just that motherhood was my soul calling- it’s that I deeply started searching for my God  (knowing full well I couldn’t do this without him).

And he had never stopped calling my name.

I am not who I used to be- yet I’m more me than I ever have been, with still so much inner work to do.

My prayers are often simple, mother and wife prayers.

Sister and daughter prayers.

Friend and creative prayers.

But right now, in this moment I can feel the head winds coming.

Change is imminent. In obvious and subtle ways.

windI’m exhausted and sitting here eating cupcakes thinking of the past changes in my life.

So grateful and so blessed that change did come, even if it brought trials.

So I’ll sit here a little longer with my cupcakes and birdsongs and press on.

To think of the changes ahead, to refuse to rest for too long, lest I become stagnant.

So my prayer today is simple and strong and I must be ready:

Now, use me Lord, and prepare me for the wind.

-J

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